It’s My Way or the Highway

by Lorinda Turley

I am obsessive compulsive.

Our home is where it begins.  We have different colored, kid-friendly plastic dishes, when not paired with their matching color companion in our cabinets, I fix it.  When a canned good is not facing outwards (like others in our pantry), I fix it.  When towels are folded differently and laid on top of one another, I fix it.


I have found myself correcting others in our home for these very things not being done the “right-way.”

The “right-way” when it comes to loading and unloading a dishwasher, folding and putting away laundry, cleaning counter tops and putting away groceries is, of course, subjective.  Yet in my psychosis it has to be done in a specific fashion or it is incorrect.

My weakness: there is only one-way to get the desired end result, MY WAY.

I know that we are all placed here upon the earth to gain experience…our own experience, not an experience dictated by me.

As parents we should love, give guidance, make necessary corrections and then allow our children to flourish. As human beings we should provide similar respect to all others within our sphere.

Here’s my dilemma…I STINK AT IT!

I am better than I was five years ago and then I have set backs and am worse than before.

Recently, I have experienced a set back.  An overload of maintaining a “happy” family and the reality of its difficulties.

I participate in an event and rather than enjoy myself, I will mull over in my mind how I would have done it differently…the”right-way.”  Our children finish their chores and I go in and criticize all that is not done “right.”  My words, tone, and demeanor are rude.

This is not my desired end result.  I am going the “wrong-way.”

In these moments of realization, when I recognize I am no longer enjoying the journey, I step back and…


Okay, maybe not.

But in this moment it is exactly what I did.  I took the kids for an impromptu trip to the beach.  We rented a beautiful beach house three days in advance, visited friends nearby and thoroughly enjoyed a break.

Here’s the issue.  We returned home.

As I stepped back into life and its commitments, I literally felt my heart rate quicken.  The difference, I was able to take a deep breath and push forward with a new attitude.

I have been counseled not to run faster than I have strength.  While at the beach I reflected on where I gain strength.  It is when I love and serve my family with gladness.  It is when I exhibit faith and allow His strength to buoy me.  It is when I recognize the need in helping others feel valued as more important than the “right-way.”

I am back on the path…the “right-way” for me and only me.

I too hope you find your “right-way”, if not~I can give you some pointers :).